2014 Season Projections

After a long wait – and after a lot of changes to this league, both in structure and ownership – the start of the 2014 season is upon us, and it should be a fascinating one.

Here’s how the 2013 season finished up, first by record (top six spots going to the playoff teams) and then by points scored.


1. Bizarro Al Davis (two-time champ)
2. RG3 for President (runner-up)
3. The Sean Taylor Memorial Franchise
4. Temujin
5. Noord’s Team
6. Kobra Kai
7. That’s My-Danek!
8. The Replacements
9. Drunken Butterfly (now Bortles Kombat)
10. AP Says PIIHB
11. Shillustrious Moores (now Ground ‘N’ Pound)
12. Kamehamehaaa
13. Chef’s Menu
14. Huirtuit Hail Marys (now Smokin Red Devils)
15. Carnivorous Pigs
16. Murrells Inlet Maya

Points scored:

1. Bizarro Al Davis
2. The Sean Taylor Memorial Franchise
3. That’s My-Danek!
4. RG3 for President
5. Temujin
6. Noord’s Team
7. The Replacements
8. Kamehamehaaa
9. Kobra Kai
10. Chef’s Menu
11. Bortles Kombat
12. Murrells Inlet Maya
13. Carnivorous Pigs
14. Smokin Red Devils
15. AP Says PIIHB
16. Ground ‘N’ Pound

What obviously stands out is the absurd strength of the West Division, which last year featured the three best teams in the league in terms of pure points scored (as well as the worst), as well as the North Division having all four of its teams inside the top half of the league. We’ll see if that kind of disparity between the divisions transfers over to this season, as well.

Speaking of that, I went through and used CBS’ projected points for each player to figure out a power rankings heading into the season for all 16 teams. I ranked each teams in terms of points scored using a projected starting lineup of the highest projected point scorers at each position. Yes, I realize that this is a bit flawed – it doesn’t take into account bench depth, bye weeks or injuries, and the projections themselves are flawed – but thought it would be a fun exercise heading into the season. Here’s what I came up with:


1. Bizarro Al Davis (2542.3 points)
2. The Sean Taylor Memorial Franchise (2477.5)
3. That’s My-Danek! (2306.6)
4. Bortles Kombat (2264.3)
5. Chef’s Menu (2124.1)
6. Murrells Inlet Maya (2114.7)
7. RG3 for President (2063.7)
8. AP Says PIIHB (2037.7)
9. Kamehamehaaa (1989.7)
10. Kobra Kai (1981.6)
11. Smokin Red Devils (1967.2)
12. Temujin (1948.3)
13. The Replacements (1892.5)
14. Noord’s Team (1874.7)
15. Ground ‘N’ Pound (1711.7)
16. Carnivorous Pigs (1518.9)

A couple things stand out here. First, obviously, is the offensive firepower of the West Division, where the top three teams from last year finished in the exact same order here that they did in overall points last year. The other? The surprising strength of Chef’s Menu and Murrells Inlet Maya, two teams that finished in the bottom of the standings last year who rank fifth and sixth in projected offensive points heading into this season. It’ll be interesting to see if that will translate to both of those teams getting a lot more wins.


1. RG3 for President (2546.25 points)
2. The Replacements (2364)
3. Kamehamehaaa (2304.25)
4. Noord’s Team (2284.25)
5. The Sean Taylor Memorial Franchise (2265.75)
6. That’s My-Danek! (2219)
7. Smokin Red Devils (2085.25)
8. Temujin (2046.75)
9. Ground ‘N’ Pound (2029.25)
10. Murrells Inlet Maya (2022.5)
11. Kobra Kai (1979.25)
12. Bortles Kombat (1964.5)
13. Chef’s Menu (1960.75)
14. Bizarro Al Davis (1951)
15. AP Says PIIHB (1750)
16. Carnivorous Pigs (1598.5)

A couple of things also stand out here. First is the serious defensive might of the North Division, where the top four projected defenses in the league all reside. It’s not hard to see, given how things shook out last season, why the North and West Divisions were so strong last season. The other thing? How far down the list Bizarro Al Davis is projected to finish defensively, where the two-time defending champions are projected to be 14th out of 16 teams in terms of defensive points.


1. The Sean Taylor Memorial Franchise (4743.25 points)
2. RG3 for President (4609.95)
3. That’s My-Danek! (4525.6)
4. Bizarro Al Davis (4493.3)
5. Kamehamehaaa (4293.95)
6. The Replacements (4256.5)
7. Bortles Kombat (4228.8)
8. Noord’s Team (4158.95)
9. Murrells Inlet Maya (4137.2)
10. Chef’s Menu (4084.85)
11. Smokin Red Devils (4052.45)
12. Temujin (3995.05)
13. Kobra Kai (3960.85)
14. AP Says PIIHB (3787.7)
15. Ground ‘N’ Pound (3740.95)
16. Carnivorous Pigs (3117.4)

A few things stand out here. First, The Sean Taylor Memorial Franchise looks like the clear strongest team in the league this year, well over 100 points better than the second-best team, RG3 for President. What also stands out is what looks like will be the continued dominance of the North and West Divisions, which make up seven of the top eight teams in the projections. One interesting wrinkle in this year’s schedule? This year’s rotation happens to match up the North and West Divisions, which should lead to a lot of heavyweight fights during the regular season and will likely play a large role in who makes the playoffs.

What else? The four teams in the South Division are bunched up from spots 9-12 in the projection, separated by a mere 150 points, which will hopefully lead to all four teams being competitive all season long. Then there’s what appears to be the very weak East Division, which features three of the four worst teams in the league, including Carnivorous Pigs – which enters the season dead-last on both sides of the ball and in the overall category by a very significant margin. The guess here, though, is that Ground ‘N’ Pound will finish the season with the worst record and the No. 1 overall pick in next year’s rookie and reserve drafts, however, given the incredibly tough division they reside in.

If these projections hold, The Sean Taylor Memorial Franchise will win both its first division title and league crown, RG3 for President will win a second straight division title and finish as a runner-up for a second straight year, Bortles Kombat will win its division in its first year under new ownership, Murrells Inlet Maya will be back in the playoffs after finishing with the worst record in the league a year ago and the West Division will place three teams in the playoffs – which would be the second time that happened in the league’s three years in existence.

In a few months, we’ll see just how accurate these projections will turn out to be. In the meantime, good luck to everyone both in Week 1 and the rest of the season.

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